Final Lecture

The blissfully calm part of the year has arrived. I turned in my grades yesterday.  Cue Alice Cooper.  (Ever since I was in high school, I never considered summer as actually starting until a) my last class was done and b) I listened to that song.)

Next up:  Graduation Festivities.  One thing Mount Holyoke does extremely well is Graduation Weekend.  Nary a dry eye in the house by the end of it.

But this year, the Graduation Festivities present me with one of those insoluble puzzles.  Now, don’t get me wrong, I like solving insoluble puzzles. (And, yes, I do know what “insoluble” means.  It’s an ironic moment is this here blog post.  So stop calling me Vizzini.)

On Thursday night, the senior class organizes what is billed as Final Lecture.  They get a few professors and staff members to come give a talk; I’m one of the speakers this year.  Now this is a very nice honor, but it presents a problem whenever I have been asked to do this or something like it.  I have 15 minutes or so.  This year, the senior class gave absolutely no guidance on what they want.  So, what should be the topic of my talk?  My problem is that I can give a 15 minute talk on a veritable plethora of topics, ranging from the obvious to the obscure, and from deadly serious to perfect froth.   I’ve been asking assorted seniors what they would want and I get such helpful advice as “Something meaningful, but not cliché.”  I guess that means reflections on “Eat, Drink, and Be Merry for Tomorrow We Die” is out.

It’s an odd problem—on the Thursday before graduating, what would you want to hear in a 15 minute lecture?